95. What I wanted to say at the Birthday Party but didn't...

In this episode Laura Sexton shares insights on money habits, and her practical approach to living debt-free. She recounts a humorous yet enlightening experience at a birthday party where her daughter requested a 'credit card,' sparking a discussion on the pervasive influence of credit cards in our society. Laura explains her family's choice to live without credit cards, the pitfalls of credit reliance, and her strategy for paying cash for large purchases. She also previews upcoming episodes, including a powerful conversation on reducing grocery bills and building a strong financial identity. Join Laura to learn how to eliminate financial stress, increase freedom, and build a lasting legacy.

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Transcript

Laura: 0:46

Hello and welcome to the Accelerate Your Legacy podcast. I'm Laura Sexton, your trusted financial coach and money mindset specialist. Join me as we explore the world of money and money mindset while also paving the way for a lasting legacy that extends far beyond money. Together we'll eliminate stress, amplify freedom, and ensure you stop paying for your past so you can start saving for your future. If you're seeking peace in your finances, more margin in your budget, and a legacy that inspires generations to come, you're in the right place. The accelerators, I've been doing research on our financial identity and how it affects us socioeconomically, which is just fascinating. And I have been writing an outline for weeks because I've gotten so excited about this and you know, I'm not done. I'm not done. So I have to adjust on the fly and put something else out. And so I was like, Oh my goodness, what am I going to do? Cause I don't want to get behind. I don't want to miss another week. And I was just thinking about a birthday party that I went to with my five year old this weekend. We're at this place where it's a giant indoor play place and they have all of these arcade games and it's just, the kid's best favorite thing, all of their favorite things all added together. And I was just sitting here going, this is insane. But I got to sit around and talk with a bunch of moms and I was having a good time. And one of the things the kids get is a. Card with tokens on it. You know, the arcade games don't use tokens or quarters or anything like that anymore. They use cards and this game card that the kids had was loaded with like 10 worth of play, which is amazing. And my daughter runs up to me and she goes, mommy, mommy, can I have the credit card? Can I have the credit card, mommy? And I just started cracking up and the people around me did too, because we don't have credit cards in our house. I don't know how to get it through my children's head that we have a debit card, but we don't have a credit card. And so I'm just laughing. I'm like, you want the card to play the game? She's like, yes, mommy, I want the credit card. It's like, okay, well, we don't have credit cards in our house, but here is the game card and you can use the game card to play the games. So she runs off and the women around me are laughing because they're like, you're the money lady and you can't get her to quit saying it. It's like, I know it's so ingrained in our system. And it is the most marketed product in our country. And I'm just cracking up because she's five and she just wants to play the game and she doesn't know what it's called other than a credit card. So I give her the game card. She runs off and then people are asking me, well, How do you not have a credit card? And of course, this is my favorite subject, but being at an indoor play place with kids screaming all the time and never knowing when you're going to be interrupted is not always the best place to have this financial conversation. Also, it's a birthday party and people don't want to get bogged down with my opinions on things. So I just said, Oh, well, we don't do credit. We don't worry about our credit score or anything like that. And we just live with a debit card and we just pay cash for things. And then the moms start talking about, Oh, well, I use my credit card responsibly and I always pay it off. I wanted to do this podcast today, tell you all the things I wish I could've said, or I wish I would have said to these moms, but I didn't because it was not the right place. It was not the right venue. And nobody was asking my opinion. So to the moms, That say, well, we pay it off every month. I think that's wonderful. If credit cards are Not a problem for you and you think that you are winning the financial war by using your credit cards wisely Go ahead. That's great. Good for you. I think that they're terrible. I think they're the cigarettes of the financial world I think that using them opens you up to cancer But I didn't say that at the birthday party because that would be gross. But credit cards, let's be honest. You know, credit card companies don't give you those points and those miles just out of the goodness of their heart. They're out to make money. They're a multi billion dollar a year industry. And, you know, it's absolutely crazy. I just heard a statistic that this year, Americans will spend somewhere between 1. 3 and 1. 7 trillion dollars on Christmas, and a third of that's going to go on their credit cards. That's a lot of money that's going to go on a credit card and make credit card companies very, very wealthy. And people will be paying their credit cards off paying off Christmas until March, April, May. And so I think it's really important that we don't allow that cancer into our home. You know, one cigarette's not going to kill you. But when you use it over and over and over again, and then it starts to get out of hand, and then you can't help yourself, that's when it becomes a problem. That's why I call it the cigarette of the financial world, because there was a time when people thought, oh, this isn't gonna hurt you. This is gonna help you stay skinny. This is gonna curb your appetite. There's so many positive benefits to tobacco. Except they're carcinogens that are going to kill you involved. So I didn't say those things to the moms at the birthday party, cause that would be crazy, but I was thinking them. And then one of the moms asked me, she goes, well, what do you do when you need to qualify for something? I was like, well, what do you mean? She's like, well, when you want to qualify to buy a new car, what do you do? I looked at her and I said, well, we pay cash for it and I just said it very matter of factly and then I kind of moved on. I adjusted the conversation because she looked at me like I had three heads. In fact, when we need to buy a new car, we took cash out of our savings account. We paid cash for a new car. I bought a 15, 000 car in cash that I had been saving up for, for many years. We've been planning to buy that car when we knew we had three kids that were sitting just fine in seats in the back of my, of my Ford Edge. They were fine, and we knew that we wanted to have another baby, and so we knew that we were gonna have to eventually buy a minivan. So you plan ahead, You make plans ahead of time instead of falling into the trap of what's convenient right now, what happens right now, what am I doing right now? Right now, your comforts of right now are going to steal from your comforts and ease of your future if you let it. Now, there's nothing wrong with creature comforts of today. Creature comforts of today are absolutely wonderful. And I think that if you have the margin and the bandwidth, definitely indulge in some of those creature comforts. But we don't want to get so bogged down in the now, now, now, that we don't ever think about the future. We don't ever think about what could possibly be happening in front of us. So one of the things that I would have loved to have said to these moms is I don't need to qualify for something. I don't need some arbitrary number that was invented around the same time I was. The FICO score was invented in the late 80s. It's only as old as I am. It does not define me, it does not have anything to do with whether or not I am wealthy, whether or not I am good with money, all the FICO score says is I'm really good at paying other people back. I'm really good at borrowing money. That's all it is. I'm good at borrowing money and I tend to pay it back. That's what your FICO score says. Now, I have clients that are in positions where we have to work on building their credit score because they already have a mortgage, but they've gotten really bad with their credit cards. Their credit score is not going to go away. Just because you get rid of consumer debt does not mean that your credit score is going to go away. If you have a mortgage, it's going to cause problems for trying to get to a zero credit score. It just is. And to be completely honest, as soon as I buy a house, I'm going to have a credit score again. I'm not going to be able to say, well, my credit score is zero. I'm going to have to pay that off first. And then I get to go back to saying that. There are times where I do have to work with people. I'm building their credit score because they're in a transitional period and they need to build their credit score so they can sell one house and buy another. That is a reality. But it's a reality we don't have to live in if we make better choices today for our future. None of these are birthday party conversations. I've shared it with them. They may listen to this and they may come back and be like, why are we talking about me on the podcast? If you have friends that think the credit score is the be all end all share my podcast with them. Let's get them changing the way that they think, because the best way for you to change your self financially is to make sure the people around you have similar goals and values as you do. In a couple weeks I'm going to be talking about how our financial identity is one of the leading indicators to our socioeconomic status and that's going to be a really powerful. Episode, but before then next week, I have a wonderful guest that is going to come on the podcast and talk all about budgeting for groceries, keeping your grocery prices down. The best way to do that. She and her husband paid off 250, 000 in debt. And part of that was them. Cutting their grocery bill by 10, 000 a year. You don't want to miss this one. This one is going to be so good, so powerful. I learned things and I know that you will too. I can't wait to have you back on the podcast next week. You know what it is accelerators go out and make a difference. Thank you for investing your time with us today on the Accelerate Your Legacy podcast. Remember, your legacy isn't just measured in dollars and cents, but in the tools, habits, mindset, and reputation you leave behind. Don't just listen to the show, but take action on what you've learned. Share this wisdom with a friend who can benefit and help us spread the word by rating and reviewing the podcast. For questions or encouragement, reach out to me on Instagram at Accelerate Your Legacy or explore the resources listed in the show notes. I will be back with you next week. Until then, build your legacy with intention.