87. The First Step to Financial Independence

In this episode, host Laura Sexton shares a personal update about her recent illness, which led to some podcasting delays, and a big announcement: she is 12 weeks pregnant with her fifth child! She also talks about upgrading her podcast equipment and the challenges of balancing motherhood with her goals. 

The main topic of this episode centers on financial identity and mindset. Laura reflects on the importance of deciding to change one's financial habits and identity, drawing from her own experience of becoming debt-free. She emphasizes that real change begins the moment you decide to shift your mindset, not after the work is done.

In this episode we’ll discuss:

.     The Power of Decision

.     How Identity Drives Habits

.     Overcoming Money Scripts

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Transcript

Laura: 0:46

Hello and welcome to the Accelerate Your Legacy podcast. I'm Laura Sexton, your trusted financial coach and money mindset specialist. Join me as we explore the world of money and money mindset while also paving the way for a lasting legacy that extends far beyond money. Together we'll eliminate stress, amplify freedom, and ensure you stop paying for your past so you can start saving for your future. If you're seeking peace in your finances, more margin in your budget, and a legacy that inspires generations to come, you're in the right place. Well, hey there accelerators. I know that things have been a little inconsistent over the last couple of weeks, which is really not like me, but I got rather ill and that will really throw you off if you haven't planned ahead and done a whole bunch of podcasts ahead of time. Getting sick can really throw things off. And I did 84 episodes without an issue. And then I get to 85, 86, 87 and happened to get sick. But I have to let you guys know, I'm going to give you the inside scoop, something brand new. No, not a lot of people know. And if you're listening here on the podcast, you are going to be one of the very first people to know about this. But as of the date of this recording being released, I am 12 weeks pregnant with baby number five. So, I've been sick for a good reason. I'm not, I'm not upset about it. I wish that I hadn't been sick. That would have been great. But if I'm going to be sick, at least it's for that reason. Also, I got some new podcasting equipment, so things may sound a little bit different. My kids tore my headphones apart, my headphones that have my microphone and everything. They decided they were going to Chick fil A, which I love, and they tore them apart. No good. No. No good. Well, my friends, today I wanted to talk about your financial identity and how to change your mindset when it comes to your money, it's funny because I've been thinking about this a lot This last month, I went to Tennessee and I got to be a part of a Ramsey solutions event. That was just incredibly fun. And Dave Ramsey was there and he was speaking and his daughter came up and spoke. And she's like, there's 1 thing Dave does that just drives me insane. Which I thought was really funny. I was like, yes, I'm here for this conversation. And she goes, I hate when he claps his hands and tells you just to change. Like you can just change with a clap of your hands. And I started to laugh because I was like, no, that's really how long it takes to change. I was laughing because I 100 percent get where she's coming from and I 100 percent get where he's coming from. And so I wanted to talk about both sides of this issue. First of all, Dave's whole rant where he claps his hands and he goes, if you decide you want to change, you just change. That's the whole thing, right? He's like, if If you want to make a change in your life, you just change. And on one hand, it's incredibly difficult to just up and change your whole life. You can't just decide, I'm never going to make a mistake again. That obviously doesn't work. And I think that's where Rachel's coming from, where she's like, you know, you, you're going to make mistakes and things are going to happen. You're going to go back into old patterns sometimes, but I think where she is wrong. Is as soon as you decide to change, the soon as you decide that you are a different person, that's when the change happens. The change doesn't happen when you've proven it to yourself. The change happens when you do the, when you make the decision. The change happens when you decide, I'm never going back to that. I'm never going to live that way again. The change happens. When you decide. It happens in that instant. I'll go back to when I found out that my husband and I were 372, 347 in debt. That day will live in infamy in my brain. I remember where I was. I remember what I was doing. I remember what I was wearing. I remember what I was feeling. I remember the overwhelm and the fear. It was a hard day. It was a really, really, really hard day, but it's also the day that I decided I wasn't going to live that way anymore. And that's the day that I credit is the day that I changed my life. You see, my life didn't change after I did the work. My life changed on the day I decided to change my life. So maybe that's why I have a different take on this than Rachel does, right? Where Rachel's like, no, you have to do the work and then, and then things change. Yes. Because when I am. Painting a room, right? I would love, I would love to paint my room. Let's do that one day. If I were going to paint my room. The room is not different when I decide to paint it. However, it will never be the same again. I will never be able to look at the room the same way again because it hasn't been painted yet. And all I'm doing is dreaming about what it's going to look like in the future. And I cannot be in this room feeling the same way about it as I did before when I thought about painting it. And when I decided on the color and I went out and bought the paint, And when the room is being painted, it's not a whole new room. It's not completely done, but it's changed. You see, it's in the process of the changing that the change occurs. The change in the mindset comes when you decide to change. Saturday, August the 31st. You may have seen a post that I made on Instagram. I heard another financial expert say that when, in his opinion, in his I guess in his experience, people that are out of debt who worked hard to get out of debt, feel worried or they stress out about not going back into debt more than they did worrying about paying the debt off. I'm really, really confused by that because the day I decided that I would never go into debt again was the last day that I ever. Went into debt. I have never once questioned it. I've never once thought about it. I guess that's not true. I have thought about it. I'm like, oh, my goodness, what would have to happen in my life? What kind of cataclysmic event would have to happen in order for me to go backwards? I can't really think of anything that would cause me to go back into debt. What would be enticing enough because I changed. On that day in October, 2016, I changed. I have no desire to get a credit card. I have no desire to get a car loan. I'm very cautious about the idea of a mortgage and that's the one debt. I'm not going to scream at you for. I'm not going to scream at myself either for that matter. I'm going to make sure that I make a reasonable choice on home on price on. All of the things I'm going to make sure that I fully understand what I'm getting myself into before I get myself into it. But at no point in time have I been like, I'm so worried that I'm going to go back into debt and I'm so concerned about what life would be like if I have to go back and I was so stressed out during that time and I don't want to go back to y'all. No, I'm just never going back because I changed. You see, I changed in October, 2016, but my debt payoff didn't happen until December 31st. That was the day that I made the final payment on the final debt, and I was completely debt free. But that wasn't when my life changed. That wasn't when my mindset changed. That wasn't when I got free. I was free the day that I decided I would no longer be slave to the lender. I was free the day that I decided I was no longer going backwards and all of my money was going to be future focused. My life didn't change after I did the work and did I, did I make mistakes along the way? Yes, friends. I did. I have never used a credit card since that day in 2016 I've never gotten a car loan since that day in 2016 I've never used debt of any kind since that day in 2016 I've never been concerned about going backwards. My journey did not end on that day. It started on that day, but my change, my change happened on that day. So all of this to say. When it comes to your financial mindset, when it comes to you and the journey that you want to go on, sometimes all you have to do is clap your hands. and change. That's it. You have to decide. And actually this lines up scientifically, what we have learned through books like Atomic Habits by James Clear, where he has gone and done the scientific research. If you want to form a habit, the first thing you do is you identify your new identity. You change who you are on the inside, and then you allow your habits to align with your new identity. I am a person Who never uses debt and guess what? All of my decisions align with that. I am a person. And then, you know, whatever the thing is, if you were struggling with being a person that wakes up when your alarm goes off, guess what you decide to be a person that doesn't hit snooze. You decide to be a person that wakes up when your alarm goes off. And yes, my friends, I am preaching to the choir because again, I am pregnant. So I get very, very tired. And it's funny because I've gotten to the point where I'm, I'm kind of like a toddler at two o'clock in the afternoon. I have to go to sleep because I'm exhausted and I can't make it through the day. And. It's really, I mean, it, it, it's kind of insane because then it's eight o'clock at night and I'm exhausted and I go to sleep and then five o'clock in the morning rolls around. I'm like, I haven't slept enough. I have to sleep. I'm just kind of, I'm kind of at that stage in life where I'm like, I'm just going to have to resign to the fact that I need a nap. It's fine. A nap on the baby naps. It's totally fine. But I want to be a good mom who wakes up as Laura, as opposed to waking up as mom, mom, mom. Right. And in order to do that, right. I know that I have to wake up before my kids, so I know that, yes, I may hit snooze a couple of times, but as long as I get up before my kids, I'm doing the thing that's important to me. I will eventually get to where I can get up when my alarm goes off and everything will be fine. I will get there. Do I backslide? Do I make mistakes? Yes, of course I do, but I'm working on it. And I focus in on what the main intention is, that I want to be Awake before the kids. So if I hit snooze a couple of times, as long as I'm up before the kids, it's fine. I've gone off on this really random tangent. I'm going to, I'm going to bring it back here. So if you, you're struggling with your money, maybe it's because you haven't changed the identity of the person in your mirror. Maybe you haven't decided who you really want to be. And I think that if you were to really kind of dig down into that, you can see here are the things that are important to me. Here is who I want to be. How do I change my identity so that I can change my mindset about my money? Now if you're struggling with that and you're like, you have no idea how I grew up, Laura, like you don't understand this. These are the, internal scripts that we tell ourselves over and over and over about money. Things that we've heard our parents say, you know, money doesn't grow on trees or we, we can't afford that or maybe next month or, you know, whatever it is you heard your parents say, or maybe you had parents that were like, yeah, sure, let's get it. Yeah, sure. Let's get it. Like, yeah, sure. Let's get it. And they were drowning themselves in debt, but you didn't know that. So you picked up their spending habits, not realizing that eventually you're going to have to try and out earn your spending habits. Yeah. That can be really difficult. If you need help overcoming your money objections, if you need help getting your money script, To change, change, let's have a conversation because these are the scripts that are running in the back of your mind. The things that you tell yourself that aren't necessarily true. Those are the things that will hold you back if you can't grab hold of them and decide that they no longer serve you and decide that you are going to change how you talk to yourself, change how you feel about money, change how money operates for you. Because money is a tool, to give you the life that you want to live. And I want to help you make the most. Of that tool. Also I posted on Instagram asking for topics that you guys would like to hear and I got a ton of responses. So I am really excited about that. The next 11 or 12 episodes that are coming to you from me will be coming based on topics that you have asked for. I am going to be trying to get guests in the future. I am going to try to have live coaching sessions here on the podcast. I would love it if you or somebody that you know We'd like to come on here and ask a money question. We can talk through it in real time. I think it's going to be absolutely fabulous. So if you have an idea for something that you would like to learn about on the podcast, just send me a message over on Instagram. I am at accelerate your legacy, or you can find me in the email inboxes. Hello at accelerate your legacy. com. All right, my friends, my accelerators, I will see you next week. Go out and make a difference. Thank you for investing your time with us today on the Accelerate Your Legacy podcast. Remember, your legacy isn't just measured in dollars and cents, but in the tools, habits, mindset, and reputation you leave behind. Don't just listen to the show, but take action on what you've learned. Share this wisdom with a friend who can benefit and help us spread the word by rating and reviewing the podcast. For questions or encouragement, reach out to me on Instagram at Accelerate Your Legacy or explore the resources listed in the show notes. I will be back with you next week. Until then, build your legacy with intention.