78. Defining Your Own Success Story

In this episode, host Laura Sexton explores the concept of success, challenging conventional definitions tied to fame, wealth, and social status. Through personal reflections and client stories, the host encourages listeners to define success on their own terms, considering various aspects of life where financial stability can contribute to their goals. The discussion emphasizes the importance of setting clear, attainable goals and celebrating progress, no matter how small.

In this episode we’ll discuss:

.     Your Personal Definition of Success

.     The Role of Money in Success

.     Setting and Celebrating Goals

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Transcript

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Laura 0:02

Hello and welcome to the Accelerate Your Legacy podcast. I'm Laura Sexton, your trusted financial coach and money mindset specialist. Join me as we explore the world of money and money mindset while also paving the way for a lasting legacy that extends far beyond money. Together we'll eliminate stress, amplify freedom, and ensure you stop paying for your past so you can start saving for your future. If you're seeking peace in your finances, more margin in your budget, and a legacy that inspires generations to come, you're in the right place.

Speaker 3 0:46

Hey, accelerators, if I were to ask you, what is success? How would you define it? It's a really interesting question. I talked to a lot of different people and I get a lot of different answers. Now, I went online and I looked up what the Oxford dictionary says, and it says success is the accomplishment of an aim or purpose. It's like victory or triumph. Success is the attainment of fame, wealth, or social status. That's prosperity and successfulness there. A person or thing that achieves the desired aims or attains fame, wealth, etc. It also says a similar word is the word triumph. Well, that's interesting. The archaic definition of success is the good or bad outcome of an undertaking. I found that one very interesting. Interesting. The good or bad outcome is the success? Hmm. That's interesting. But right now, what I want to look at, a lot of the definitions I just gave there had to do with fame. What does being famous have anything to do with success? There are a lot of people who are quote unquote famous. We were not successful or not somebody that I would like to be like. So to me, they might be famous, but I don't think that being like them would be the definition of success for me. There are a lot of people who are famous that I would love to be just like Julia Roberts, for one. I would love to have her career. She's absolutely fabulous and I love her. Success is more than a financial number. It's more than fame. It's more than wealth. It's more than social status. What is success for you? Maybe success is having happy children. Not always happy because we're going to have to disappoint them. They don't run the world, so they don't get everything they ever wanted, but they're happy. They're joyful. They're content. Ooh, content children. Maybe content children is what I should be after. That would be successful. Once you define what success is for you, you can sit down and answer this big question. What areas in your life can money help you be more successful in? Can money help you be a successful parent? Absolutely. It can help you, you know, pay for big adventures. It can help you keep a roof and nice clothing over their heads and on their bodies. It can help you pay for food. What areas can money help you be successful? What about your nutrition, your health? You can afford all of the organic things. You can pay for a really nice gym membership, maybe even a coach to help keep you in shape the way that you want to be money can help you, pay for medical expenses. Money can help you be successful in many different areas. Where else can money help you be successful? In your career? Yeah, your business will grow if you have capital to help grow it. That's absolutely certain. You're here with me on this journey and we're talking about success and it's funny because my mind keeps going in a hundred different directions and I'm trying to be really on point and thoughtful with you today, but I keep coming up with new ideas and thoughts in my brain because I'm an entrepreneur and it, it never shuts off. How can money help you in your marriage? How can money hurt your marriage? Let's think about that. It's funny because somebody was saying the other day we were talking about getting a prenuptial agreement and they're like, well, you know, 1 brings in a whole lot of money and the other 1 doesn't bring in anything or how do you split things up? And then she made a very interesting comment to me. She said, well, like it or not, you already have a prenup. I was like, what do you mean by that? My husband and I didn't sit down and write anything out. And she goes, yeah, you're just letting the government write it for you. Well, that in and of itself made me stop and think my husband and I aren't getting divorced. I told him if he leaves, I'm going with him. And he said, if I leave, he's not signing papers. So we are in agreement. That is not a thing for us, but I'm curious. Have people thought about this? Have people thought about? I don't know. I think this, I think this podcast might be going a little sideways y'all and I hope that you're coming along with me. All right, I'm going to get back on track. I'm going to get back on my notes. We're going to go back to that. Now that my brain is thinking all of the things. When do your financial numbers take away from your feeling of success? I had a few conversations with clients recently where their numbers just made them feel completely unsuccessful. And 1 of them, we've been working really hard. She'd already been trucking along and baby step 2 and she was just feeling overwhelmed and defeated and she could not. Get out of her own way. And I'm so thankful that I get to be a part of her journey and we get to walk together. She and I were talking about it and I said, well. Let's look at what's actually happening. Let's choose to look at the reality of the situation, not how we feel about it. So she has, in the last couple of months, spent money on her credit card. Now, we're working on paying the credit card off, and when we started working together, there was about 19, 000 on it, and then we got it down to 12, 000. And then it got back up to 16, 000 and she was feeling really down on herself and she's like, it's at 16. I can't believe it. I said, yeah, but this time last year, it was at 17. So, even if we're looking year over year, you have still paid off money. You're still below where you were when we first started working together. And she said, well, I guess that's true. I was like, and you've had some really big life events that have caused problems. I said, so let's start celebrating the things you have accomplished. Now, 1 of the big struggles that she had was she quit her 2nd job because her 2nd job was Quite literally sucking her soul out every time she had to go. She just felt awful. She didn't like being there. They didn't respect her, but she had extra money that she could put towards the credit card. And I said, you can always come back and get another job. You can always go out and get another job. Why don't we do something else? That's going to light you up. So we found a way for her to make not the 800 a month that she was making the job that was sucking her soul out, but she's making 500 a month doing something she loves from home. Yeah. Now, 500 dollars a month may not seem like a lot and it's less than the 800 dollars that she was making, but she has a more positive outlook. And she is able to move forward and start making progress. We also implemented for her some milestones. That she can celebrate along the way. So when she was paying off the other parts her debt, doing the debt snowball every time she'd pay something off. She could celebrate. But this 1, it's a 3rd of her overall debt that she's tackling here. She's struggling because it doesn't feel like there are any wins along the way. So we put some in there because we need her to feel success. The more successful she feels, the more she's going to push forward and make things happen. Now, consequently, right after I talked to her. I met with another client who also was not feeling very successful because her numbers. Weren't clear to her when I'd ask her, well, you know, what is this looking like? How are you staying on your budget? And it was a little bit more disjointed and she wasn't as detailed as she used to be. So, in that instance, her numbers were taking away from the feeling of success because she didn't know what they were. So, how could she feel like she's getting any kind of success, any kind of traction if she's not paying attention? We definitely implemented some systems in there for her so that she could move forward and feel the success that she was having, because when we finally dug into it, we saw that she was making really good progress and it had been a while since she felt like she made progress. So we're putting a new system in place for her to make sure that she not only feels successful, but she continues to be successful as well. As a society, we tend to overestimate what we can do in a day and underestimate what we can do in a decade. That's totally true for me. I have a list of things that I want to get done today and I probably won't get to half of them, which is really frustrating and can sometimes be demoralizing. To counteract that just make your list shorter. Do the big things first. Adjust how you're going about your day. If you just get 3 things done, what 3 things can you do today that will make you feel successful? Implementing some sort of strategy like that will make your day run smoother. It will make you feel more successful at the end of the day, which will be a vote of confidence to who you can be again tomorrow. And if you look back at the last decade of your life, I'm going to bet that you have done more than you even thought possible 10 years ago. If we can sit down and dream really big, we can make big things happen. But a lot of times we're just chucking along doing the things that are right in front of us. I have to ask you, where do you want to be in 6 months? It's a question I ask any potential client that comes in. 1 of the 1st things we do is we set a goal for what we want 6 months to look like and feel like. Because by saying, okay, in 6 months, I want to be here. We can work backwards and we can make a plan. But setting a 6 month goal. Isn't the best way to be successful over time. It's the best way to be successful in those next 6 months. Right? But you don't want to just look 6 months ahead. If we're setting goals, a lot of times with my clients, I want to set a 6 month goal. And then I want to set a 1 year goal and a 3 year goal and a 10 year goal. Where do you want to be? Because what's most important is that once you know where you want to be, you can then align your actions to go towards that end result. We talk about goals all the time. You want to make sure that they are smart, that they're risky, that they're relatable. Those are 2 of my favorites. I want you to succeed. And so I want you to define for yourself what success actually is. You see, success, it's more than a financial number. If you're going to be successful, what does that look like to you? Not to anybody else, just to you. What does your success look like? My success is not going to look like I'm a Kardashian. Okay, I don't think that I'm ever going to get to flying around on private jets all the time, owning my own jet, having multiple houses, being on TV all the time. Like, that's just not going to be. My reality, but I don't want it to be that. Success for me is going to be. Being self sufficient, being able to live at home peacefully with my husband and my children success for me is. All of my children graduated from high school and moving on with their life in the way that is glorifying to God and makes them a good member of our community. That's successful. None of those things had anything to do with a financial number. Success for me and my business is helping people reach their goals. Success for me and my business is helping other people win. So what is success? What does success look like for you? If you wouldn't mind sharing that with me, I would really love to cheer you on. I would really love to be a part of your goal, your systems. I'm so proud of you for showing up every week. Thank you so much for listening to this podcast. I guess that sounds a little silly that I'm proud of you, but I am. You're showing up for yourself and that should be applauded. So here I am applauding you and thanking you for spending a little bit of time with me this week. You are awesome, Accelerator. Now go out and make a difference.

Laura 12:53

Thank you for investing your time with us today on the Accelerate Your Legacy podcast. Remember, your legacy isn't just measured in dollars and cents, but in the tools, habits, mindset, and reputation you leave behind. Don't just listen to the show, but take action on what you've learned. Share this wisdom with a friend who can benefit and help us spread the word by rating and reviewing the podcast. For questions or encouragement, reach out to me on Instagram at Accelerate Your Legacy or explore the resources listed in the show notes. I will be back with you next week. Until then, build your legacy with intention.